No matter how bad it gets. No matter how much I hate it. I have to stay in LA at least 3 years.
Today, August 1st 2010, marks my 3-year anniversary with the City of Angels. The question is: should I stay, or should I go?
To help myself answer that question, I have taken myself out on a date. I've imagined this date many times since arriving in LA. I imagined white table cloths, candles, fine silver, maybe a glass of wine or some sipping scotch. I would ruminate, then masticate, then ruminate some more. I would scratch my chin, and say "Hmmm..." in the delightful manner of esteemed intellectuals. I would order dessert and coffee. I would finish my last bite of tiramisu, sip my last sip, tip generously, and as I stood I would drop my napkin on the table. At the moment of impact, extraneous thought would leave my mind and all that would remain would be a stunning sense of clarity about acting, life, the universe, and everything.
That was the fantasy, here's the reality: My date is taking place in a Starbucks, not a fine Italian restaurant. I've sipped my last sip - through a green straw. Boy oh boy is real life different from the movies.
There has been no Siddhartha-style burst of enlightenment. Instead I've got an empty plastic cup, a tongue numb from chewing ice, and a mind just as muddled as the day before. Yet, nonetheless, I have reached a conclusion:
I'm staying in LA, and I'm staying in the acting game.
Thanks to all of my readers for keeping me company on this journey.
5 comments:
You'll stay long enough to be in one of my shows, and you'll like it.
STAY!!! That's what I say. I don't know anything, however, and often make incorrect decisions.
Oh my god you made THE decision. It may not have been in a romantic setting, but you did it and did it with conviction. Good for you. I don't have the balls to make any decision with conviction. :)
It's funny that I should have stumbled upon you, upon this page, upon this particular post, upon this few month old blog. I say that (over and over) because I too am trying to make a difficult decision on whether to stay where I am at, uncomfortable and lonely, but strong willed and chasing a dream: or to return to my comfort zone surrounded by friends and loves ones where life would be easier. It never dawned on me to ask for some one else's opinion because it just couldn't be that some one could possibly understand how hard it is to make a decision like that. But seeing this has just made me inspired to continue on. I wish you the best of luck as I have since you left for L.A.
Post a Comment