China, Oh China!

So I am currently somewhere in China, where exactly I do not know. Some place North of Laos and South of the North Pole.

When I first entered China I could only think of Disney Land. Everything was so shiny and new, colors were bright and sidewalks were a mile wide. Then I slowly came to realize, I was in Disney Land, China. It was the happiest place on earth if you were Chinese.

Unlike the Asian countries I have been in up 'til now, China's economy is not based on tourism. In two days, Gabriel and I have only seen one other white person - and none of the locals speak English. I know it's a silly thing to be shocked by, but I've been able to get by with "hello" and "thank you" in the local language in every other country up 'til now. To have someone say something in Chinese - then say it louder 'cause you just don't get it, then laugh 'cause you don't get it, then take a photo of you to share with friends - is frustrating.

So now I'm trying to teach myself Mandarin, but if any of you have heard me sing you'll know that a tonal language will be a challenge. Language is such a wacky thing, I'm surrounded by people making sounds that convey thoughts and emotion but it makes absolutely no sense to me. It's a wonder we ever learn our primary language and it leads me to suspect we aren't the only creatures on this planet who have developed language - we just can't understand the dolphins yet.

Also, there isn't really any English signage around. Not even the cute stuff that you'll find at http://www.engrish.com/ For the first time since age 4, I'm illiterate. If you ever felt like your education was a lot of wasted years - let me be the first to disagree. I can think of few goals more important than a literacy education for every person on this planet.

Things that are now very difficult because I can't read Chinese:

• Reading a menu and ordering food at a restaurant.


• Determining where I am on a map.


• Finding a Chinese phrase book.


• Finding a toilet without having to mime peeing to a stranger.


• Buying shampoo & conditioner, not shampoo and shampoo or conditioner and conditioner.


• The list goes on.

More to come...